9/23/09

Pujo 2009 etc etc...


Pujo 2009 starts today, Maha Shashti today. Pujo is so early today. Its good in a way. The time is great, with a hint of rain pattering throughout the day. It always rains during Pujo, always, don't know why. But I feel old this time. There isn't that interest to go pandal hopping that i used to go in my younger years. It all feels the same. Except that u gotta go see the Pandals, Made of different materials. But what difference does it make? In the end, its the same idol of Durga and her children. Its been a long time since i have been to the 'thakurghor' in my house. People need a belief to hang on to. A hope that will keep them going, an energy to carry on with life's valleys. Yes some people do find that solace in their gods. I don't have one. Before an exam students pray. Even i have,but to exactly who am i referring to here? I have no answer to that. Its just that I have always found that I am happy when I am with my friends and family. I have found out that that's what keeps me going. N i have found that life turns out to be good always somehow. Yes,it happens with me too-good times pass fast while the bad ones last. But I somehow now cling to the hope that betterment is on its way... that's my hope that's my belief,not the idols. But every person has their own forms of belief, I respect that. Pujo,now i believe,is to be enjoyed and experienced in phases. This phase is simply to delve into the spirit of it, enjoy the warm-heartedness,love and addas. Gone is the time when pandal hopping was a thrill, going far off to see prize-winning pujos a different fervor altogether. That phase will come back again I know.But that's a different time in the future-When it is up to you to see the kids enjoy the pujos. The energy will be new then,refreshed. I wish this phase would stay. Sure,it would mean the staying back of all the worries and responsibilities of our growing age but its worth it. It does seem childish,these whims of mine.But i really wish so. I am happy with the way things are in my life. Apart from the constant worries of my future career where i wanna do so many things,there's a bliss. I have my friends, my family always.That's a lot for me. Life's short,too damn short,there's so much i wanna do. But i gotta wait till the right time. Sometimes i feel like plunging ahead....y don't i just get into the thing i wanna do? But something holds me back,a little voice in the back of my head tells me," stop idiot, you've got a lot to right now. there are a lot of things on your mind which u have to do first,i am your mind, i know, i feel the burden". And i stop in my tracks, my thought wavers on it for a while and then i force it to disappear. I have no specific plans this pujo, today,I am going out with my cousins, Saptami no plans as such yet, Oshtomi will be at pia didiz n then whole night with school frends, n Nobomi Doshomi again no plans as such.Oindrila's not gonna be here this pujo,will miss her this time. we do have fun together.Anyway, much about it all, have to sleep,really. Gotta wake up tomorrow to a day full of fun and laughter. :)

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