11/29/09

Gone...??Or Not??

I left my childhood somewhere.Didn't I? If I had not, I would not be who I am today. And I don't know if that makes me sad or happy. I go there sometimes. Looking at those people there,the places, they somehow in some weird way tug at my heart strings,in a way nothing else can. Its different. I miss them i realize. Ever since I was born,this is what I was surrounded by. Every day, every hour,minute,involved them. They form a different story. A special one,close to my heart. I guess that's attachment.I realize that sometimes I miss all of it,especially when I am back in Bagbazar. The narrow lane leading to my former house,the people there,the hundreds of kittens and puppies growing up I have seen in that lane,the walks by the Hooghly river during sunset,the chanting of hymns by the river through that microphone,the sight of the boys jumping off the boats and the pier into the water,climbing back again only to dive back again, having peanuts sitting there on the sloping ramp by the river,watching the evening train go whistling past, the art school where every Bagbazar kid issent to I guess,'Barnali',and I don't know if it exists anymore even,the shopkeepers who knew me since i went out with my parents to buy something.

Fact is,thats where home is. Those memories,people and that place has a different charm altogether for me. Its different. Thats where I grew up,learnt the ways of the world, learnt how to play cricket in the street,cycling,video games, watched tv for the first time,tied that shoelace in that bunny rabbit ears knot for the first time. It is the place I came back to everyday after school for 12 years of my life. For me....that's a second home. Obviously with passing time,Dhakuria is now my favourite of the two places.My life my friends and everything is here now. But what I wanna put across is that memories are priceless. And worth keeping forever..

11/19/09

Suspended in Jupiter skies....

I sit on a table in the splattering rain chairs all around me full of people.Can
anyone see me?No one notices as I wait, wait for that eternal feeling of joy.I reach out to touch the swirling oceans,and in a sweeping glance see the whole of the blue skies.


Metamorphosed into the reality of life,I seek refuge in the priceless memories from afar.The urge to touch and feel them again, deliriously strong. The rain still patters as the stars sparkle out, shimmering yet again through the watery skies. I wait for the pattering to stop,wait for the throng to crowd the streets again.

But till then, I have her with me. Every memory comes back clear through the rippling puddles. I keep holding onto her. Is it because I want to or have to? The nothing that i know about it is as turbulent as the Jupiter skies. But yet I do. When the night turns darker still,she knocks on my door.When sadness sets in,she takes my hand in hers. When the joy comes,she is still by me. I take one look at her and I know of the happiness forever,that eternal feeling of joy. And then the wait to step down from the table and watch the crowd fill the streets with their daily lives isn't long anymore.....

11/10/09

Forever,MJ.

The stage is set. Dim lights blink. On and off.On and off. On and off. A BANG!! And the spotlight is on the center of the floor. A shadow comes forward. The mere sight of the silhouette of the man on the stage is enough to send the crowd into a tizzy. I wonder at the power of this man. The power that he has over millions of people across the world. Video footage of fans screaming their lungs out, collapsing, swooning over this man who pioneered break dance and moonwalked the world into a frenzy is an overwhelming sensation to watch. Your breath stops as the lights rev up,the moves he executes to the beats, as the music that reminds you of your younger years reaches a crescendo and then BOOM!! He is here. The God himself.


This video here is an example of what tireless efforts can result in. I am sure shivers will run down your spine when you watch this. That such a man could exist,that such an amount of power over humans is possible,its exhilarating,you hold you breath,awestruck at what he has achieved, awestruck at what he was and not in just one nation. All over the world,people have screamed their lungs out for him, and to see him in flesh and blood seems divine. Almost unreal,all of it...But MJ was and is what will never be again....

******Michael Forever,Rest In Peace******

11/9/09

weird...

There's something strange going on in my life.I am at my hostel in Durgapur through the weekend when other people have gone home. Dunno wats gone wrong with me....

11/4/09

Through the curtains..

I sat still. Michael Jackson was healing the world in the next room. The lyrics were meaningful. But that was the least of my concerns right then. I had been lying in the couch. But the tiny scraping sounds had made me sit up. Where were they coming from? I wished MJ would pause for a moment(stupid thought!!)Dusk had just fallen. There was a bright moon in the sky. Moonbeams slithered in through a lengthy chink between the curtains. Serene I thought...looking at the whitish disk up there. The craters about it were in the shape of a rabbit or so I had thought for years.Perspective.Period.
The scraping sound came again. MJ suddenly stopped. There it was again. I looked around.Nothing. Something suddenly pulled at my pants,like a kid would do if he wanted toffee. I looked down and propmptly jumped shrieking. What were they?? I didn't know. Can anyone help me??? :) Complete this.... :)

Scared and Safe

 It seems like I go through these sine waves of anxiety and determination. I ride out the waves differently of course. It seems like the anx...