Tumult

Its easy to confuse
than straighten out the facts in your face.
delusion is another word for life
as it is for people who care.
The world is changed
and with it, changed have we.

Let alone yourself in a dark room one day.
the mere suffocation of it all
is but a mere fraction of what reality is.
Wasn't there a time when everything was what it was
And not something it was supposed to be?
Time closes your eyes before you know it's time to close your eyes.

Kindle in yourself a little fire.
Let it burn for a while.
But the strangeness of the fire is that you will not feel a thing at all.
Hold on they say, but to what they never do.
You're stuck where you are forever,
claiming it's not your fault.
But the fault isn't yours either, Is it?

Destiny can change a man's life
as it can ruin one's.
All is written beforehand and you are nobody to cross Her path.
Do what you will, change however you may,
what you see is never what it is.
But What you see is always What it is.

The stars conspire with the planets
On what is to become of each soul.
Its their universe we forget
where we are just passing souls.

Never will we ever find joy
because we have taught each other greed.
Our needs and wants grow each day
and we plant them again in our seeds.

Instead of taking in sights the stars offer us to see
we are busy plotting growth curves,
trying to be heroes we will never be.
Cursed upon by our own selves
Yet tried to be loved by the trees
we have failed every hope
and been brought down to our knees.

A little bit caught up in so much that’s on offer
Its hardly a question why you aren't there for each other.
Every break of dawn tells you the night is past but will come again
But yet you while away, while away till its too late to know yourselves.

Stand still for once and look back at the road
Bending and twisting, disappearing into the trees.
Stand still for once and you will see every little thing
Every detail in your world without a crease.

Happiness is but a lie in the face on the face
Another effect built by the unknowing defeated human race.
Yet it exists in a way not known to u, me, she or him.
It hides, flows, vanishes, burns and kills if need be.
Such is its power and to seek it we lust
Disintegrating religiously,
stitching back again and again
till nothing’s left but rust.

A contemplative evening sets free businesses and ships
But never the thought of picking life up from where we had lost it.
An evening with friends separates the laughter from the guilt
But never the thought that that's what life is.

Children

Saying goodbye to children is one of the worst things in this world. Every child, however quiet, however naughty or loud, brings about a certain new effervescence to life. Being grownups, what is it that draws us to children so much? The innocence about them, the ability to take in everything quietly, the prospect of not understanding the world, the ability to please and be the center of attraction, the blatant shows of love, the unrestrained questions, remarks and statements at anything and everything? Maybe all of that. Maybe not. But having children around makes for a better life. You learn so much. You do not act rashly around them. You control so much. Your will power, ability to love and understand and be a better human being grows more than anything. Just for the sake of the child. The attachment is unspoken, the bond is secure, the time spent flies ahead. But when the time comes to go own ways, the sadness,too, is unrestrained. You find yourself a more compassionate person, better at understanding people and dealing with them. And you know you're the better man. And you know that's what counts.


Dedicated to the school car pool drivers, the school bus drivers, the swimming trainers, the teachers in schools and creches, the tutors and people in similar professions.

Out of Reach

A while’s passed between when the bell rang for the first time and now. Seems like yesterday yet far away out of reach. We were so eager to get to that next level, we didn't pause to let that last bell sink in. We just waited for it to ring. As it did, an uncontrollable joy burst forth at the prospect of the ending. The ending that was the beginning of another ending.

Every ending is a hard time to go through. With it comes all the smiles, sadness and the promises kept and broken. But it did not matter then. We were on our way to becoming men of the world. How could we know that those very men did yearn to be us? Everything was new; a big world awaited where we assumed we knew much. Maybe we did except for the feelings that came at the end of the day. Those make it worse. Some turned out nosy, some turned out smart, some turned out to be fools, some turned out happy, some turned out sad, some blamed others, and some just wanted to go back. We were scared, nervous, yet eager and enthusiastic. We just wanted the end so that the next level could start. Life has progressed a lot in these days but at every step the burden gets heavier. Looking out for people was never part of the plan. We couldn't even look after our ownselves let alone the others. At times we know that this is what it is, this is how it goes, this is the package, this is life. But there are moments where the longing to ditch and drop everything and run away is just way too much. But we don't at the end because in spite of all that there is, we know what is right and what is wrong.

The best place to run away is back to where we started out. But since we cannot do that there is no use in running. It's a short life-if you can't have the best, why settle for something at all?

Whatever...

Such as not what it is,
is what it is supposed to be.
but it turned out quite what it is on the face.
whatever it may be.

Growing up

Its been quite a while now. Quite a while that am "growing up". The whole process is so complicated, with twists and turns everywhere. Why couldn't it have been a simple straight road? But accepting everything without any other options, i understand it is part of the whole package. There is no way out. Watching films, reading books gave us dimensions in hypernumbers to look forward to. But there is just one way to look. All those stories, the songs are just to help us along the way, a kind of a guide.

I landed a job at Tech Mahindra on the 13th of June,2011. Since then, life has been ultrasmooth somehow. There isn't any threat of eminent exams, no constant bickering with parents, no filling out applications. after 17 years of academics, this does feel rewarding most definitely. But then again, a sense of responsibility, fulfillment, nervousness, apprehension, anxiety, happiness are all mixing, meddling and swirling together to form a very large imaginary incomprehensible mass inside my brain. I am not confused anymore that I know. This is suddenly a new feeling. I now know that when I go out now, I will have acredit card in my wallet, and that very wallet which was once almost empty all the time but filled with scraps of paper, tickets, and other odds and ends will now have bills from shops, cards, ID's, photographs etc etc. That simple little wallet will grow up suddenly too. It all feels so sudden and weird.

My life has been branching out too increasingly. And with all the expanding, I find less and less time for all the people in it. True that I spend a lot of my time at home, but then again I guess it's not just me. Old friends, new friends, keeping track of them all is difficult. Life is taking strange turns. I spend time at the bank, I have to do my own shopping, my parents aren't complaining when I stay out late, they don't have a problem with me watching movies, going out everyday. I know I yearned for all that to stop but I think I kinda miss all that. Its human nature, I guess, to stay in that safe zone; familiarity with the surroundings topping everything else. I never ever in the weirdest, most extreme,wildest of my dreams thought I would miss having school/college, stuff to do, study, listen to parents screaming at me. It just doesn't make sense or does it??
:) :)

Jingle Bells

Well, out of boredom, and amidst a writer's block, this is what I came up with. :P Here is a retake on Jingle Bells. :D

N.B. : Just pronounce Ferrari as Ferraray


Dashing through the snow
In a blood red Ferrari
O'er the fields we go
Laughing all the way
Girls all wearing bling
Getting spirit-high
What fun it is to laugh and sing
Any song tonight

Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a blood red Ferrari
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
A girl in a Ferrari

A day or two ago
I thought I'd take a ride
And soon all the Fanny Brights
Were seated by my side
The night was Christmassy
everything was to top notch
Till one miss fanny bright
Spilled over all the scotch.

Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a blood red Ferrari
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
A girl in a Ferrari

Somewhere

Yes somewhere when u found me
I took to u like a blanket on a cold cold night
It was there that i knew what to do about u.

Hushed up smiles, and joy unbound made way through time
while time tried in vain to catch up with us.

Summers spent on swings
listening to guitar making way for frost.
Winters abuzz with people on the street
made us desolate to lost.

In spite of the little joys,
the longing lingered on.
A heartless animal like it seemed to power on.

Rains collected sheets of vapor on the glass,
gave us slates to write us upon.
drops of sweat united
till the heart inside was torn.

Besides that scarf u wore the other day
ur sweater is still with me
the purple one with the whites drawn in
that u wore the day i set u free.

Call upon the wine to stir the night up
a bit of cheese and a rose will do to light up ur face.
We'll wear sunglasses and strut about heroes.
Dangerous in the night to each other,
Yet wanted in a way unexplained.
Soothed by your touch,
you're electrified by my feel,
There are stories that will keep on coming
By the first kiss did we seal.